dream bedrooms, etc

Sorry for the poor scan on the following picture- I scanned it several years ago at my mothers house on their aging fax/scanner.



I don't know why I still love this bedroom, but I do. It now looks dated to me- a little too "country victorian" and the sisal heart shaped rug looks tacky beside the bed. And yet I still look at it and sigh to myself, about how lovely the pink and white quilt is, and how soft and romantic the lightweight voile window treatments look. It doesn't matter that this magazine is now over 15 years old!

I have a feeling my enjoyment of this bedroom is linked to the year I found it- the same year that I began housekeeping on my own, and a time when I was trying to find my style. This bedroom has a little bit of me in it- from 1994! It is a time capsule, in a way, capturing my growing independence and the style that would eventually be uniquely my own. Do you have a favorite room from years past that you still think of? That helped mold your unique style?

Growing up, we frequently relocated due to my fathers occupation. We moved 9 times before my 16th birthday. Never being too "at home" anywhere we lived, we decorated very sparsely. I remember having lovely quilts and bedspreads, but never nice curtains for an ever changing window size, or a pretty hued paint. My room was dull in contrast to the girls I would befriend. I had one particular friend whose room remains memorable to me. Her name was Angie and her childhood bedroom still is one my favorite all time rooms. I can picture it as though I only just walked out of her room, skipping down the stairs with her on our way to cheerleading practice. Her girlhood room molded my tastes in decorating from that time forward!

Her room was very sweet- she had bright emerald green carpet, and a white wallpaper that was scattered with tiny red rosebuds and the same green leaves that were the color of the carpet. Her bedding was crisp white eyelet lace with mountains of ruffled white toss pillows and dolls. There was just one window in the room, and it had eyelet priscilla curtains adorning it. She had a netted canopy that she liked to envelop her dolls within. With the bright carpet and wallpaper and the summer fresh bedding, this room was pure sunshine. It was the happiest of rooms, and perfect for a little girl to daydream and slumber within. We would sit up for hours giggling in this room, and no matter how sparse the daylight, somehow this room remained lit. The room in many ways actually looked like Angie- a petite strawberry blonde with "Annie" style curls and freckles like Pippy Longstocking. She had dimples and never ceased smiling.

In my mind, a thousand times, I have recreated this bedroom and do still.

At that time, I thought what I loved about her bedroom was that everything coordinated. That her dresser matched her headboard. The wallpaper matched the carpet. The bedding matched the curtains. It has only been in my adulthood that I have come to appreciate what I was really drawn to about this room- the stability of it. This was a room ready to welcome only one little girl. Custom designed to match her tastes and her collections. This room was fully nested and if it had a name, it was "Angela" as if you were quiet, you could hear her name whispered in every corner of the room- an echo of her growing personality and style.

My bedroom by contrast reflected the instability of our life. I was a shy little girl who hated moving. Hated new homes, hated new schools, and hated trying to make new friends every 1.5 years. I had nondescript bedding to match whatever carpet the new home we would be moving into had. And to match my nondescript bedding was a nondescript personality I had forged to try and make transitions into new schools easier.

After each move, I worked on arranging my bedroom furniture to be in the exact position it had been in our prior home. This was my first foray into decorating- and an act of self nurturing. Once my bedroom was a carbon copy of the bedroom before, I felt a little more at ease in my new surroundings. A empty room began to resemble my personality, and I found the ritual of decorating to be soothing. I was nesting.

It was a relief and a comfort when I was in early high school that my father changed careers and we moved onto the outskirts of my grandfathers farm into my great grandmothers 100 year old farmhouse. You will often hear me talk of this home, and the accompanying land. My parents reside there to this day, and it gives me peace to see them settled and nesting themselves.

I do not find it ironic that once we had the stability of "home", I also began to build self confidence and independence. The first thing I did was buy a comforter set that matched the carpet in my new farmhouse bedroom. The carpet was rust orange!!! Oh it was hideous! But, I found a blue and white comforter set that had tiny peach rosebuds on it that perfectly matched the carpet. The blue quieted the strong rust color, and I remember my mom being very pleased with how I decorated the room. I was pleased too. I can remember standing in the doorway, looking upon my new bedroom, and realizing the bed was in a different place than it usually sat in each of our homes, but that it looked "right" in this room. I am sad that I never photographed the room.

And better still, I found a friend who remains a best friend through to this day. We email regular and visit on holidays.

As far as Angela's room- whether it represented something missing in my pscyhe or just a girlhood favorite, I still carry her room with me throughout my life. In my decorating you will frequently see touches of white eyelet. White eyelet to me is eternal, and continues to comfort me. It is also a tribute to my best friend for two years in junior high school, and a reminder to make every home my own, that my home should quietly whisper my name to all who enter, and that you should be able to find me here- secure, content, and uniquely "me".



I am now entering my third trimester with the "little twins". At Mondays appointment, Twin A weighed 2 pounds 1 ounce, and Twin B weighed 2 pounds 2 ounces. One thing I seem to be good at- I grow twins with very little discordance between their weights. However, I am also starting to wind down, and am feeling pretty tired in the evenings. Duane now puts the babies down by himself, and I m retiring to bed quite early.